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  • jenwilson98

"Stop complaining!"

Our conversation was about normal stuff--nothing out of the ordinary. So, I didn't expect what happened next. I nonchalantly mentioned something that was no longer any of my business to be thinking about and she let me have it!

"Oh my, GOD! Stop bringing it up. That part of your life is over and you've worked through the steps of forgiveness. Sure, it's going to hurt and for more than a little while. But, every time YOU bring it up, it's like re-injuring your own heart over and over again."


She was so right. We are all guilty of self-inflicted wounding at times and it can be an awful cycle to be caught in. We may think we've dealt with the fallout of a break-up, job situation or family circumstance. We can also be unaware of how dangerous it is to 'fish' for support or rally others to our cause.

Negativity. Gossip. Malicious intent during conversation. Slander. Jealousy. Selfish ambition. (Just writing this list makes me cringe.)

The Apostle Paul has some encouraging words that won't feel comforting at first. But, these words from Paul will make the impact they need to make not only in our personal life but in the lives of people you really do care about.

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29

God’s Word Changes Things

When I began to study and apply God-honoring principles to my personal life, I was a terribly negative person. God often caught me off-guard by his loving kindness and He began to show me how harmful my negativity can be. And as I took action to stop thinking and speaking negatively, I actually became happier--I think even more peaceful. After a while, however, I felt like my circumstances really weren’t that different. I prayed and asked the Lord about it. I felt an impression on my heart: “You have stopped talking negatively, now start to work on doing positive things to change the situation.”

Truths to Speak about Myself

I needed some brain washing--and some heart cleansing. So in my prayer time I decided to make a list of the things that were rightfully mine according to the Word of God. I spoke God's truths out loud. I did it in our house by myself. I wasn’t talking to anyone else—I was declaring the Word of God over my own life.

God’s Word is powerful. Hebrews 4:12 calls it “living and active” because it has the power to transform your mind and emotions and make you free.

As you study the Bible, I encourage you to take each thing you read personally as if God wrote it just for you—and then begin to speak it out loud and watch God move in your life.

Learning to confess God’s Word out loud has been life-changing for me.

Truths to Speak Out About Your Thoughts

Remember, God’s Word is “living and active” and has the power to change your mind and heart (see Hebrews 4:12). This list of scriptures will help change your thoughts:

The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace. Romans 8:6

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:5

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13 NKJV

Truths to Speak Out About Your Words

Proverbs 18:21 says, The tongue has the power of life and death. And so God wants us to choose our words very carefully.

This list of scriptures will help you change your words:

From the fruit of their mouth a person’s stomach is filled; with the harvest of their lips they are satisfied. The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit. Proverbs 18:20-21

Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Proverbs 16:24

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29

Set a guard over my mouth,Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips. Psalm 141:3

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14 NKJV

Continue to Speak the Truth--even when you see no changes!!

The changes I experienced were gradual and did not come overnight. I often felt like the Holy Spirit had to 'catch me in the act.' But gradually I did experience changes personally and professionally. I aspire to verbalize my faith daily and speak in agreement with God. But, I get caught from time to time--and that's why I am writing to you.

Make the changes you need to make. Work on you.

Create lists of scriptures as a starting point and make a list of your own confessions—use promises from the Word of God that you can speak out loud over your life, your family and your future. I encourage you to speak God’s Word out loud daily. Get in agreement with Him and start declaring the good things He has in store for you.

As you apply scripture to your personal life, your situations and circumstances, I believe you will be strengthened in faith...and you will experience something new: the transforming of your mind. (Romans 12:2)

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. 2 Corinthians 5:17

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